...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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