all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
