How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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