im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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