Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
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