did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
