You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Randomize
