I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
Randomize
