Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
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