I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
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