He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Randomize
