hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
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