Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
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