just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Randomize
