how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize
