theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
