Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
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