Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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