I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize