there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
I think my moral compass just broke
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize