first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
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