she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
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