thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
When did we convert life to cartoon?
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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