So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Randomize