I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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