How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
Ketchup is God's man juice
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Randomize
