I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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