Screwed.edu
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
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