we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
