does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
