Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Randomize