Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
This toilet bowl is my home.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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