so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
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