party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Randomize