i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize