talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Randomize
