He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
