At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
Randomize
