I just saw a hot homeless man
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Randomize
