I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
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