There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
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