its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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