Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
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