BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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