Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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