i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
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