just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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