THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Randomize