Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
so that wasnt chicken after all
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize