The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
Slut skills are useful in every country.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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