you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
