I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
